The feedback from my last pitch was very helpful. One person said it looked like I was reading my pitch. I wasn’t, but I made sure to seem more natural and fluid in this pitch. I made my presentation more conversational and natural this time around. I also know my pitch better at this point. I tweaked my hook to relate to the audience a little bit more, but otherwise I kept it mostly the same and tried to keep my safe structure and describing the problem, the product and the solution. In my feedback I was told to dress more professionally, but I did not follow this advice. I feel that I am dressed appropriately enough given the environment I am in. I would amp up my wardrobe if I was giving this pitch in front of an audience.
Hey Molly! It's been a while since I've followed your idea, but I'd like to say that I really liked your pitch! It seems like you basically have it completely memorized, which is awesome, and your pitch was overall very personable. Your pitch appeals to me as if we're both people who want to buy this product. Like it was mentioned in previous posts, Prof. Pryor has stated multiple times that we don't need to introduce yourself (name, major, and stuff), as I believe we are simulating the fact that our audience already knows who we are. Try and think of it as you're walking on to a stage after an announcer just introduced you and everyone is clapped. I liked that you started with a hook this time, but you could try and make your first sentence really bring the UMPH to your pitch. Through your words, I see the passion you have in your product, but I think you could stand to try and make your tone of voice a bit more like "HEY! My product will save your life! Buy it!" Your video sound was kind of quiet this time, I had to plug in my headphones and turn up the sound, just fyi.
ReplyDeleteOne question I have is, is your product targeted towards people who live in one room studios? I'm not sure if this is the product intent, as I haven't been following your posts, but if it is, you should incorporate it into your pitch. I think that if you narrowed your demographic to single rooms, you would be able to better your marketing strategies. You could focus your marketing to sell to studio complexes and hotels instead of individuals. Really any building that has it so that people only have one room, this product would really excel. If you sell this to hotels, for example, and get every hotel, motel, and inn to install your device into every room, you'd make a massive profit as opposed to selling it to individuals.
Great job overall Molly! I look forward to seeing the progression!
Hey Molly! This is the first pitch I have watched of yours, but I really like the idea! I am also from Florida, so I do not have this problem, but I can see it being a nuisance. I like that your idea came from a personal experience and that you incorporated that into your pitch. Overall I think your pitch had a good delivery and you spoke very well. One thing I think that could be added to grab the audience's attention is some sort of statistic- maybe the percentage difference in utility bill or something. Great post!
ReplyDeleteHi Molly! Great pitch! You presented your idea in a well organized manner as well as formal manner. The hook seems to appeal to the audience more and grabs the attention well.The only thing I would say needs some improvement is to be a little louder when presenting, other than that you seem to really know your pitch. Great job!
ReplyDeleteHi Molly,
ReplyDeleteI really enjoyed this pitch. I can definitely tell that you were more comfortable with it and knew your pitch better. I love the new hook as well. It is much more relatable. I think one thing that would help you sell your pitch better would be telling the audience how each one would personally benefit from or see actual results for choosing your idea. Great Job.